So as I was driving on the freeway this afternoon to register the car in Provo, I had an epiphany.
People have no clue how to drive.
I also realized another thing. When I get behind the wheel and am alone in the car-I am a demon from Hell.
I wasn't always this way! Oh no! I used to be such a good and peaceful driver. But it's almost as if there is this road rage bug that lurks in the steering wheel of each and every car- waiting for you to grasp the wheel-then it bites you. I think the one in the Honda I drive has extra venom, because I seem to get it extra bad. I can control myself-mostly-when others are in the car, but when I'm alone..Hoo boy! It's like someone released the beast!
It's not like I'm a person with really bad road rage. I mean, my sister Savannah is so scary I have to duck when we pass cars for fear I'll get the bullet to the chest and not her.
Moving right along!
When people act retarded as they're driving-like going too slow for my taste-I'll usually pass them. Illegally if I must. I'll give them mean glares and yes, yell at them. Maybe the usage of a certain finger on rare occasion if warranted, but that’s it!
I think.
However! I don’t think it’s just me! I’ve seen some of the strongest people fall to this road rage bug of death! It comes from nowhere, hiding in your steering wheel, waiting…
Then SNAP! They have snapped!
Maybe there are just too many stupid people that the DMV give licenses to. I think they just want the money! They don’t care about our safety on the streets!
They don’t care that people driving on the ramp to get on the freeway only go thirty five! They don’t care that people stop at Stop Sign Ahead signs!
They abso-freaking-lutely don’t give a crap that Mormon Minivans should not be allowed on public streets!
But, just think, when you are frustrated at the car in front of you and want to wave that select finger high.
God is watching you.
But take comfort in the fact that I’m probably doing the same scream-age in my car somewhere too.
